For all of my adult life, attaining the character and heart of the Proverbs 31 woman seemed out of reach. She seemed perfect, full of endless energy, and frankly, I never felt I measured up.
She was always giving, serving, and doing, while I struggled to keep my head above water.
Yet I’ve discovered that while her actions are honorable (and more than a little enviable!), the Proverbs 31 woman was never meant to be our idol or our to-do-list.
Instead, our goal should be to shine God’s love to the world through our actions, thoughts, and deeds. Here’s how to be a virtuous woman in a corrupt and scandalous world.
What is a Proverbs 31 woman?
The Proverbs 31 woman is taken from the description of the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31: 10-31. She is woman of fierce action and diligence, but also one of deep faith.
This passage of Scripture was a charge to King Lemuel (thought to actually be King Soloman) from his mother on how to live his life worthy of being king. She warned him of the dangers of drink and women, and in the last part of the passage, outlined the traits of the woman of God he should search for: the Proverbs 31 woman, as she has been nicknamed.
This commentary on the Proverbs 31 woman can shed some further light on the passage and help you dissect this Scripture in depth if you choose.
What is the Proverbs 31 woman most known for?
She gained notoriety for being a diligent woman who seems to do it all. As a virtuous woman, she is constantly busy doing tasks and loving her family and others well.
Basically, she’s super woman who juggles all the things and seems to do it all with grace and poise. (I’ve envied her on one more than one occasion!)
The Proverbs 31 woman:
- Fosters spiritual growth and loves the Lord Proverbs 31: 26,28,30
- Strives to take care of and serve her family well (and they adore her!) Proverbs 31:10-12, 23
- Diligently manages and maintains her home Proverbs 31:16-19, 27
- Keeps healthy and fit for her many tasks and responsibilities Proverbs 31:17,25
- Uses her time wisely and is productive Proverbs 31:16-19, 27
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How to be a modern Proverbs 31 woman in a corrupt world
The Proverbs 31 woman is constantly striving towards doing more and being better. It’s easy to feel a little intimidated or discouraged by her perpetual motion and activities. Yet we don’t have to do it all!
While the Proverbs 31 woman is an example of godly womanhood, Jesus is our ultimate example for living a faith-filled life. His humble life was marked by service and faith in action.
While it would be fabulous to thrive at being a Proverbs 31 woman (aka- do all the things well!), that’s not our ultimate calling. You don’t have to be super woman to be a woman of God! While being organized may be a helpful way to not stress and keep your cool, it’s not a prerequisite for being a godly woman. (Whew!)
In fact, sometimes vulnerability and humility are more approachable and relate able than someone who has it all together. So in order to be a godly woman and not super-woman in her own strength, strive for these character traits of a modern Proverbs 31 woman instead.
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13 Best Ways to be a Modern Proverbs 31 Woman
First and foremost, seek the wisdom of the Lord through Bible study and prayer. Pray that He would bestow wisdom on you in all areas of your life. Then, pray for the ability to make wise choices and trust that the He will graciously guide your path.
James 1:5 reminds us that God is faithful to supply wisdom in generous supply, if we simply ask. In moments when we’re tempted to stray or act in our own strength, rely on the wisdom of the Lord to lead the way.
Seeking the Lord starts with a meaningful quiet time where you get know God’s Word and have regular fellowship with Him in prayer.
With the smoke and mirrors of social media, honesty can be hard to come by. Yet a modern Proverbs 31 woman should seek to be truthful in all and to always seek the truth. Even when honesty goes against the grain of the crowd, a life that reflects Christ, upholds His love of righteousness and truth.
With full schedules and a to-do list of responsibilities, it can be easy to let in-person relationships fall by the wayside. Instead, look for tangible ways to be the hands and feet of Jesus, and to humbly serve in His name.
Even a hand-written card, a kind word of affirmation, or a simple invitation can let others know you care. In a world of modern selfishness, use the opportunity to go the extra mile as a way to tangibly share the love of Jesus.
The enemy is on the prowl and wants nothing more than to throw you off course. Be on guard for the ploys of the evil one and use Scripture as your sword to battle when temptation is lurking around the corner.
In our modern culture, he can use the idols of busyness, family, accomplishments, and even a clean house if we’re not careful to guard our hearts with God’s truth.
Being faithful is a lost art, but a cornerstone in the life of a modern Proverbs 31 woman. A life that’s marked by faithfulness, not just to God, but to others as well, is a portrayal of God’s faithfulness. So go the extra mile and be a faithful wife, mother, friend, and relative. Show up regularly to love those around you well and to faithfully give of yourself as needed.
God calls us to hold on to our life loosely. Whether we’re talking about time, money, resources, and even people, we are to live with God as the foundation of our life. When we live a God-first life, stewardship becomes an overflow of our love and respect for the Lord.
Therefore, we can live our lives with open hands as we hold tight to the promise of James 1:17.
Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.
Since every resource we have was given by the Lord, that changes how we view our control of these things.
We are willing to serve as needed because God has blessed us greatly.
Giving of our money becomes a joy when we recognize we’re blessing others with a tool to further God’s kingdom.
When God changes our life, stewardship becomes a natural response to His love and grace.
In a world that values selfies and provocative clothing, stay classy and modest. Be respectful of yourself and the men around you, and choose your clothing appropriately. Sure, be cute and let your clothing reflect your personality, but please, stay classy and dress in a way that honors God.
Seeks the Lord
As a modern virtuous woman, keep the Lord at the center of your life. Seek Him in all you do and build your life on the cornerstone of your personal relationship with Christ.
As you start your day, spend time with Him in prayer and in the Word. No matter what you face or what comes your way, trust that God has a plan for your life and that His grace covers all your missteps. He is faithful to show you the way as long as you seek Him.
As easy as it is to indulge in our feelings and emotions, that’s not what God has commanded of His bride. When Jesus’ gave us the Holy Spirit, we received the ability to be self-controlled.
While it’s not popular these days, we are called to be self-controlled and to stand firm against temptation, even in tough moments.
That means we can resist the urge to snap at our families when we’re irritated. We can stand strong when we really want that extra helping of dessert. And we can say no to our biggest weaknesses, because God has given us the power to do so. In Him, we find the power to be self-controlled, even when it’s hard and overwhelming.
In a world that craves success and to make a name for yourself, instead, make a name for Jesus. May the cry of your heart be more concerned with glorifying Jesus and spreading His Good News, than with bringing being the success the world tells you should be.
Therefore, keep Christ as the anchor of your character and never forget the ultimate sacrifice He paid for you at the cross. When we compare ourselves to His standard of righteousness, it’s hard to be proud and self-serving.
God has placed a calling and purpose deep within you. That purpose is to spread the Good News to a lost and troubled world. Yet the world clamors for your attention and longs to sway you from that purpose.
Instead, stay disciplined to the vision God has called you to. Trust that in the moments when you want to give in and give up, that God will give you the strength to press on.
Although the Proverbs 31 woman was constantly busy and diligent in all areas of her life, she is not our to-do list. While we are to guard time, our most valuable resource well, we weren’t called to over stuff our calendars and schedules. Instead, guard your precious minutes with well-honed routines to help you spend time with those you love most and pursuing God’s plan for your life.
You have been created in God’s image and molded for a purpose. That body that you have is not your own, but has been bought with the blood of Christ. Therefore, keep your body strong and ready for the mission that God has called you to. Be diligent in nurturing your body with healthy foods and staying fit for the tasks God commands of you.
Break free from the standards of the world
As you seek to glorify God and live as a modern Proverbs 31 woman, let go of the standards of the world. Find freedom in breaking the expectations of a depraved culture and find joy in pursuing Jesus instead. Trust that passionately following Him is the key to a life-lived well and a soul satisfied with the joy of the Lord.
Join us for the Living P31 Experience!!
Are you ready to thrive in everyday life and live as a virtuous woman? Join use for a new series, the Living P31 woman experience! Each week we’ll share biblical truths and practical lifestyle tips in the areas of faith, family, health, and home!
Plus, I’ve invited some wise, Christian women to share their insight on living like a modern Proverbs 31 woman and simple ways to help you live on mission for the glory of God!
The other posts in this series includes:
How do you live like a modern Proverbs 31 woman in your own life?