How You Know You’re Ready to Adopt

How You Know You're Ready to Adopt Faith Along the Way

Adoption is beautiful and it never ceases to amaze me how God hand-picks and unites families together.  To me, it’s a tangible expression of God’s love for all involved.

Adoption has changed my life and my heart by making me a mom to babies who desperately needed a forever family.

But Hubs and I weren’t always ready to embrace adoption.  We battled infertility for five years, doing homeopathic remedies, trying crazy tips and tricks, and two rounds of IUI to try for a biological baby.

In his infinite wisdom, God had a better and different plan to complete our family, only he had to bring me to the point where I had open ears and an open heart, and was ready to see what was next on his perfect path.

I believe that being open and ready to adopt is a journey in and of itself, and you’ll know you’re ready to begin after you’ve had these major revelations.

You’ve Grieved, Accepted and are Open

Whether or not you realize it, there is a grieving period as you accept that you will not have biological children of your own. For me, I spent three months wrestling with God, questioning his will for my life once he closed the door to biological motherhood.  I cried, I prayed, I questioned, I screamed and I grieved with such heart break and sorrow. Once the dream of motherhood was gone, I had no idea what was the purpose of my life.

But I knew that God was faithful; he promised to never leave my side, that the pain was not permanent and that he had a plan for me.

It’s the same with you, my friend.  God is still good and deserves your praise, even in times of uncertainty and shattered dreams.

Lay the dream of motherhood at his feet in humble surrender, and allow yourself to grieve the loss.  Cry to him, even yell at him, knowing that he is sovereign and records each and every tear you shed.  Pour out your sorrow and heartache, being completely honest and vulnerable, allowing him to slowly heal you, trusting that he can and will restore your brokenness.

Continue to reach out to the Lord with open hands as you ask him to reveal your next steps.

Don’t rush the grieving to get to the healing. Through the pain he is refining your character and sharpening your faith.

When you allow God’s light to pierce through the darkness of grief, and bring you to a place of acceptance,  you are opening your heart to receive the blessings he wants to lavish upon you.

Adoption Is Quote- Faith Along the Way

You Know You Can Love and Accept a Child That’s Not Biologically Yours

When I was ready to adopt, my dream of motherhood stopped depending on being pregnant or giving birth to my own child.  I was simply ready to be a mom and have my dream of being called “mama” come true!  I was ready to cuddle a baby of my own and knew I would love this child, this gift from God, as my own no matter what.

As you consider adoption, you and your spouse have to know 100% that you can love a child that was not born from your womb but grew as a dream in your heart.

If one of you are not able to do this yet, talk though it, pray through it, until you come to a mutual understanding and you either decide to delay or proceed with your adoption journey. (Have questions about the adoption process?  Visit here.)

You Don’t Think of Adoption as a Consolation Prize

Walking the road of infertility can be a lonely and heartbreaking.  It can be devastating when the life you’ve always imagined suddenly is not a possibility.  Thankfully, God is faithful to guide our paths and reveal his beautiful plan for us, and sometimes that plan still involves the pitter- patter of little feet through the beauty of adoption.

But adoption is not second best.

It’s not a consolation prize.

It’s not something to settle for and not less of a miracle.

Adoption is beautiful.

Adoption is biblical.

Adoption gives families hope of a lifetime of memories and snuggles.

Adoption is not less.

Before you start the mountains of paper work and scrub your house harder than you ever will in your life for your home study, honestly assess your heart on where you are on this journey.  Wherever you are, whether still grieving or sporting a newly restored heart, don’t rush the process.

Pray without ceasing and allow God to lead you in HIS timing to the baby that HE has saved just for you.

And when you hold that bundle of joy in your arms for the first time, every tear you’ve cried and all the hurt you’ve felt is worth it.  Your baby is worth it and God has written a story of hope, love and faithfulness just for your family, so go out and share the good news!

This post was shared with Essential Fridays, SITS Sharefest Still Saturday Blessing Counters Mommy Moments Motivation Monday, Titus 2 Tuesday Make a Difference Monday Holley Gerth

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About Sarah Ann

Sarah Ann is a perfectly imperfect wife and mother, and is thankful for the saving grace of the Lord. When she’s not busy folding yet another load of laundry or comforting a crying child, she enjoys studying God’s Word, writing, and spending time with authentic friends. She's passionate about equipping women to live with intentional faith, family, home, and habits at Proverbs31Mentor.com. Join her for biblical encouragement and practical lifestyle tips to help you live on mission for the glory of God.

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12 Comments

  1. Thank you so much for this beautiful post Sarah-Ann.

    My husband and I have been talking about adoption a lot recently. Whilst, I don’t know if we have fully gone through this process you have spoken about, reading this post has made me feel like we may be on the right journey. We know our desire is to be parents and really want to be open to God and trust Him to bring us our hearts desires…in His way…in His timing!

    Thank you for all your wondeful encouragement!

    ‘Adoption is beautiful.

    Adoption is biblical.

    Adoption gives families hope of a lifetime of memories and snuggles.

    Adoption is not less.’

    I love that, and will defintely be showing this post to my husband too. Just what we needed to hear at this time! 🙂
    Bind My Wandering Heart recently posted…~ The Prayer of My Heart October 2014 ~My Profile

    1. Congratulations! I sounds like you are headed down the adoption path, even if you aren’t fully 100% sure yet. Adoption is such a process and I will be praying for you on yours! Hugs!

  2. I had a dream once about a woman in a courtroom that was petitioning for an adoption. God showed me how he wrote a certain baby on this mother’s heart. Even though the child wasn’t biologically hers, it was like God wrote on her heart that it WAS hers. We have six biological children and haven’t considered adoption, but I definitely agree that IT IS NOT LESS. My view on adoption before the dream was positive, but even moreso because of my dream. Children are precious.
    Elaine Mingus (@SuperRadWriter) recently posted…Jesus Blogger – 31 Days of Blogging Like Jesus WouldMy Profile

    1. Wow! What a powerful dream! I do believe that God unites families and children that were supposed to be together. I love the idea that God writes children on a mother’s heart. Beautiful!

  3. Beautiful Sarah Ann. This was perfect, especially today. Though I am not a momma who has faced adoption, your words are necessary for another grieving and healing process that the Lord is leading my family through.
    Thank you for your precious words and being willing to share.
    Dawn recently posted…Grace found in New LifeMy Profile

    1. Thanks for always sharing your heart, Dawn! Praying for you and your family!

  4. I shouldn’t be surprised that your link drew me in from the Motvation Monday Link Party. I smiled when I saw it was your blog! I didn’t know you had adopted — that is so wonderful. I’m sorry you’ve had such hardships, but thankful that God was still able to use it for good. My husband and I have talked about adoption maybe somewhere down the line. We’ll see what God has planned. Thanks for a beautiful post and such encouraging words for others.

    1. I love that you are considering adoption one day! I think that being open to it, even if it’s not part of your path, is a beautiful way to show God that you want His will for your life and are open to all that he has planned for you. Thanks for sharing, my friend!

  5. I have struggled with infertility because of PCOS and one of my options I am open to is adoption. Actually, when I was in high school and had no idea I’d struggle with infertility I always said I wanted two kids and adopt a third. I feel a strong calling regardless if I have my own or not. But I do have to wait for my husband to feel that calling himself. I know that once we decide it, we will face journey in which we will need to rely on God. I am sure He will help us along the way! Thank you for this post.
    Edith Rodriguez recently posted…Miscarriage and Trusting GodMy Profile

    1. Edith,

      What a blessing to have you stop by and share your story! It’s awesome to know that adoption is an option for you and you are right that your hubby does need to be on the same page. Best wishes for your fertility journey! Stop by and let us know how you are doing!

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