Motherhood Myths vs. Reality

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Oh, Motherhood, how I had grand plans for you!  I just KNEW I had you all figured out and would be a mother for the history books once I was finally blessed with children.  I had it all planned. I would lovingly discipline my children and we would spend long hours learning and laughing through homeschooling.  Their bellies would full of made-from-scratch food, and we would be happier than most families, simply because I knew how blessed I was to have been given my children through the beauty of adoption.

Looking back I want to laugh out loud at my oh-so naive self!  Unless you’re in a Disney movie, that’s just not reality.  At least that’s not my reality! {If your reality is this way, what’s the magic secret?}

As much as I love motherhood, it’s not what I daydreamed it would be while I was praying for my babies.  Here’s my look back at the myths I believed before I became a mom and now that I am no longer a rookie, a glimpse into my everyday reality.

Myth– When I am a mother, I will be fulfilled and satisfied.

Reality– Friends, no matter how much I love and cherish my children, motherhood does not and can not completely fill a person.  You may LOVE motherhood and know mothering is exactly what you should be doing, like me,  but it can’t satisfy that craving in your soul.  That questioning and wondering why motherhood doesn’t fill the void in your soul is simple.  Motherhood was never designed to fulfill you and to be your everything.  That’s God’s job; to satisfy that longing gnawing at your soul with his love and peace.  His love will overflow your heart until you are filled with his goodness and radiate his joy.

Myth– Once I become a mother, it will force me to be more organized.

Reality– Pardon me as I laugh out loud {HAHAHAHA!!!!} Not only did I not become more organized, I now have two tiny people consistently undoing my hard work. I am diligent to clean up after them, while they go behind me and destroy it all. I am learning, though, to go with the flow and know I will miss tripping over toys and seeing crayon filled walls when they are grown.

Myth– Once the babies start sleeping through the night, I will be well-rested.

Reality– I’m pretty sure I won’t be well rested until my kids go to college! I am exhausted most of time, often due to Joy’s middle of the night party in her bed or Bubs’ random crying out in his sleep.  Then when I do wake, like most moms, I hit the ground running and often don’t sit down until the kids are in bed.  While my gigantic to-do-list will probably never be complete, I am learning to function on much less sleep than I ever imagined!

Myth– I can’t handle puke. At. All.

Reality– I CAN handle puke, although I truly do hate it.  I am still grossed out and sometimes gag, but I am proud that I have been forced to conquer my life long fear of vomit!

Myth– I won’t yell at my kids.

Reality- I have REALLY missed the mark on this one, because I yell more than I care to admit.  I am, however, a work in progress and God has started to tap me on the shoulder when I’m raising my voice.. I then try to change the tone of my voice and how I am approaching this situation.  Ironically, my children respond better to a calm, controlled mommy than a screaming, irate mommy on most days!

Myth- My kids kids won’t watch TV.

Reality– While my kids are not huge TV watchers now {Joy actually doesn’t enjoy TV}, there is something about shows such as Thomas the Train or Bob the Builder that will rivet Bubs and capture his full attention for maybe 15 minutes.  In those 15 minutes our house is quieter, there is only one child I need to keep out of trouble, and I might be able to get something done, maybe.

Myth– Motherhood will be one never ending play date where we are often surrounded by friends.

Reality– Motherhood can be lonely.  Sometimes I feel like an island, in which I am not truly connecting with other moms.  Sometimes I feel as though our family watches from the outside, while others live life together and are constantly together doing fun things.  I long for a connection with moms who are in the same stage of life and can understand how overwhelming this journey through motherhood can be.

Myth– I will love my kids.

Reality– I adore my kids!  I love them more than I could ever imagine and am humbled to be chosen to be their mom!  I crave their snuggles and on a bad day, ignoring the dishes and the laundry to play with them for a long period of time, helps ground me and bring me back to reality!

What motherhood myths vs. realities have you experienced?  Can you identify with any of mine? Please share what has surprised you about motherhood and know you are not alone on this wild adventure of raising children!